202 Days...

Andrew and I are working our way through "Saving Your Marriage Before it Starts." I have been having a really hard time with the chapter we are currently reading on communication. Now I have never had a problem communicating, however, I know that the way I communicate is not always helpful. I have admitted the problem and God is working on it:)

This, however, is not my problem with the book. "warmth invites your partner to be who she is, relaxed, free, and at peace" The book talks about accepting your partner for their quirks. Sounds real great right? Wrong. but I will get to that in a second.

I then went on to the exercise that goes along with this chapter, which is a simple survey of various situations and how to respond.

Question 5: Cars bore you to death, but your husband could discuss it for hours. When the subject comes up, you:
A. Explain how bored you are and ask him to talk about something else.
B. Change the subject as soon as possible
C. Work on showing some interest.

Now those of you who know me know exactly which answer I choose (A). Apparently the best answer is C.

Now strictly speaking about my relationship with Andrew, nothing but my love for him could allow me to sit and listen to Diesel Trucks 101.
What bothered me is that the correct answer had nothing to do with communication. Clearly they want me to accept my husband for the car fanatic he is and listen to what interests him. But if he was accepting me for who I am then then my answer would be correct. We can not simply accept each other. If I accept that he is long winded about cars and I just need to sit and listen, then he is not accepting that i am bored by cars and would rather talk about something else. There needs to be balance. I can show some interest in cars because I love him but i also need to be honest and tell him that I get bored and maybe sometimes instead of telling me about suspension he can call Josh and talk to him. Nothing wrong with that right?